And You Are?

26 01 2011

Well? Who are you? When you look at yourself are you the person you think you are or is there disparity between what you think and what you can honestly say you are?

For me the disparity is quite large and it’s certainly something which causes me… issues. Perhaps it’s a symptom of delusions of geandeur, which would mean that these delusions are pervasive within me and that I am by no measure the person I think I am.

I don’t know why I act the way I do, there are the diagnoses of bipolar with the multitude of things that entails, and the nacissistic personality disorder… which kinda means I’m hit coming and going. However, does this explain it? I don’t know, why the hell I can’t be… I dread using the word due to the subjective nature… normal? Why can’t I accept who the hell I am?

Can you accept who you are?

Lots of questions and no answers so far, so another question is, am I going to provide any answers? Possibly not, considering that I’m having difficulty with this myself it’s probably best not to look to me for answers. If I’m going to get a little philosophical about it I would say that the answer lives within yourself. Having read that back to myself I think it’s a load of (bringing out the lexicon of ye olde british sayings) old codswallop. Anyone can provide answers, the important thing is asking the right questions otherwise the answer is (flicks back through the pages) a load of tosh.

Maybe I should head back to my doctors and ask them the key question; When the fuck am I getting the psychological help that I badly need in order to make my life livable? I wonder what the answer will be.

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