No Real Title

28 04 2011

It’s difficult to keep things straight in a mind that seems to wrap itself round itself in a way that would impress M.C. Escher. Spurting out thoughts into a variety of tanks, each one labelled for their mood and content. The occasional spill making the ground treacherous in places.When all is said and done and the eloquence of any words has faded, what do I really have left?

When you browse the internet, especially when you look into the colloquially named ‘Madosphere’, you find a whole constellation of people with a complex array of issues. Many are desperate for answers, many think they have the answers. Problem is that answers tend to be individual, as unique as the person they are applied to. There are generalisations to be clustered around like a camp fire in the dark forest, but then we need to sit as close or as far away from that fire as makes us comfortable.

For me I’ve detailed the benefits of writing as a coping method, and also my dash into the self help book style with my SPA technique. As a comment said, we’re all looking for answers, perhaps mine make sense to you, perhaps not, my camp fire will still burn, whether it stays mine or becomes someone elses.

So what now? To be honest I’ve not been thinking when writing this post, I seem to be better at this when I only have the next few seconds to think about what I’m going to react. Seems to be the way I function best. Directed. Focussed. Maybe I’m just explaining things that don’t really need explaining but then, like I said, I’m not thinking about where this is going and letting the words splash onto the keyboard, pooling into sentences, paragraphs.

I wish I could help the people I connect with, say the words that make the world a little better. To make a difference. Very noble. Altruistic? Maybe not, maybe it’d feed my narcissism, maybe it’d give me something to add a shred of value to my life. Maybe it is altruistic. Maybe it’s what I am really here for. Maybe I need to get my ass finally geared up to do it.

Maybe I should stop trying to be Superman and find another way to… I dunno. Maybe. So many maybes.



One response

29 04 2011
Rachael Black

Helping other people is the best way to help yourself.
On the (fewer) occasions when I start feeling Superior ( I am So much better than you. LOSER!) to the times I CRAVE swallowqing every pill in the house (Enough to take out a small village) I try to remember:

The world does not revolve around me -shudder-!
Then, do something to help someone another person, or even animal.
The way to really feel great? Don’t let them know: clean their computer screen, sweep their porch. Whatever.

IT well help. On several levels. 😉
Just like comfort food;

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