Money For Nothing

17 12 2011

And chicks for free. Ahhh, the life of a benefit scrounger, so easy and carefree, if this is what it’s like then sign me up. Wait, what? I AM already signed up? Where’s my free chicks? As for this free money, I thought it was because I worked my ass off. Beginning to wish I hadn’t.Ok, that’s a bit mean as I am being treated quite well by the Job Centre. They aren’t pushing me to find work because I’m genuinely not up to it at the moment and they understand that (especially as I had a bit of a meltdown there during a meeting). Were I up to looking, if I could see anything past the present then yeah I’d be doing everything I could to find work because I need the money.

Hmm, ok, do I need money? To a degree, yes, I do have bills to pay after all. Beyond that it becomes a matter of money management and that, dear reader, is probably my achilles heel. Can’t think of a time when I wasn’t in debt one way or another. Can’t really remember a time when I didn’t incur charges for going over my limits etc. And now, more than ever, I need to avoid these charges as they take a large proportion of what income I have. How big? Up to 20% of my monthly average. 20% doesn’t seem a big number but if you consider that, at the moment, my bills account for at least 39% of total montly income then the number becomes 32% of available income. And yeah, I’m probably facing that this month as I failed to keep track of my finances.

A third of my money gone without me seeing it. Hmm, that’s not true because I’l see the money, but I can’t spend it as my bank seem to delay taking these charges till whenever I’m meant to get my statements… which I don’t get because they’re online. Speaking of which, yes I have online banking but they require a one time use code gained from a clever little device which requires four batteries which aren’t cheap. I’d have been happy sticking with an alpha-numeric password, sixteen digit user number, and unique ID code but hey, technology advances and all that. Suffice to say I have difficulty justifying the cost of these batteries at the moment.

That’s a shit situation to be in but in it I am. Moving on.

My other issue with my bank is that they seem to have fun delaying payments made by card for at least a day or so. This may not be their fault, after all one of the main problems is the supermarket where every little helps, any payment to these can take a few days to come through. Makes it hard to keep tabs. Yes, in theory I could keep receipts and track my finances that way but I’ve tried and I still get gaps that I struggle to resolve. Plus the level of organisation required to do this is extremely difficult for me to stick to. Don’t know why, just is. As such its why I’ve previously said I need PA.

Thing is, what I’ve said there is why I lose money. But why do I need money? Because I have hopes etc and I know these things cost money. I don’t want to be sleeping on the floor at my parents place. I want to do some long distance walking, to give me something to do, to raise money for charity. I want to get the one thing I’ve been passionate about back, although that one’s probably best explained in another blog post. All of it costs money, more money than I’d get on benefits.

I dunno, I have no money, I struggle to get it, and when I have it I struggle to keep hold of it for the important things. Story of my life.




One response

17 12 2011

Oh my friend, I do understand. Most of the time I spend money I don’t have. We are I’m debt by 5000 plus mortgage. I live in a world where money isn’t always real to me. Yet on the other hand it gives me huge stress.

As for benefits, I’m on ESA at support level so I get top whack but that’s still only a couple hundred every two wks. That’s supposed to cover everything for my family and its hard because when unwell I spend that in a day. On crap.

As u know my hopes are tiny. I have no real dreams. I hope you can fulfill yours though. X

Money money money –

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