Null On the Pull

10 03 2012

I’m known for my random acts of… umm… randomness, but there is always a form of logic behind each and every one of them. Why do I say this? Well, I’ve kinda joined a dating site, but trust me, there’s logic involved.

The site I’ve joined is attached to a national newspaper and I’ve “sort of joined” because I have yet to pay for the subscription which would allow me to send messages to others (£32 minimum is quite a hefty slice of change for me at the moment). Kinda demoralising when you’re unemployed and this is the kinda thing you’re doing because the vast majority, all I’ve looked at in fact, are employed, professional women and, to borrow the words from a TLC song, who’s gonna want a scrub like me?

Still, I’m on there, my profile is littered with my musing on myself and what I would potentially be looking for in a woman and any subsequent relationship. By looking at it, you’d think that I am not exactly fussy but you couldn’t be more wrong. No, I don’t care where they live, and whilst looks obviously play a part, this is certainly not something high on my agenda. However I’ve been rather cruel and said that the two things I want is someone wishing to have kids and, most importantly, someone with a personality. Yeah, I know, “How is that cruel?” comes to mind but I have quite exacting standards on the subject of an attractive personality. My criteria for looking at someones profile is certainly an indicator of this. If you start your dating profile with “Oh my, it’s so hard to write about myself in 2,000 characters” then it’s an instant no. Why? Because we all know how hard it is, we’re all doing exactly the same damn thing. There are many other things which will get a no but it’s all based on that small window into your profile, if that doesn’t interest me (or worse, repels me) then I’m not going there.

So, after all that self indulgent waffle, how is it going? After less than 24 hours… much better than I expected! Yes, I was fully expecting not to get a single bit of interest but hey presto, someone read my profile, not only that but they decided to click ‘like’ (yes, there’s a ‘like’ system). Curiosity got the better of me (it wasn’t difficult) so I read their profile. Cute woman who likes Studio Ghibli? Wow, I’m impressed, slightly bemused as to why she would like me but impressed. Course she goes and makes me insanely jealous by talking about snowboarding and even having a pic of her with her snowboard. Can you tell I really miss snowboarding? T’was my relaxation thing, even on the slopes at MK. Anyway, everything about her screamed “I have a personality!” so I liked her back because she was very likable. Thinking that would be it, I certainly wasn’t expecting the message from her. She had read my profile, done a search for nullfuture (I had alluded to the fact that I was THAT nullfuture by saying “yes, I am THAT nullfuture” in my profile) and she read my blog. This blog. If reading this blog doesn’t make someone go “Press the weirdo alert button!” then nothing will.

So, what did she say in her message? The crux of it was, and this is a direct quote, “I just wanted to say that your honesty is beautiful, as is your mind”. You know me and compliments so I instantly think she believes I’m Russel Crowe in A Beautiful Mind, which would be fairly accurate. By that I don’t mean I’m likened to brilliant yet troubled mathematician John Nash, more to a belligerent and unsubtle Crowe playing at being way smarter than he actually is. Just without the looks… or the talent. But that’s beside the point.

So what do I make of all this? Well, I think the whole experience is doomed to failure, mostly because I won’t put the effort (or my photo) in. However, I’m kinda heartened by the response so far, it’s certainly nice to get a rather good message from someone who has seen the warts n all, even if I will naturally view it with deep suspicion (something she even acknowledges!). And from an attractive personality too. Yes I know this begs the question of can you really know someone from their profile, but the answer is you can get a good idea so yes, in a way.

What now? Well, much as I’d like to reply to this person, I think I need time to gather myself before I can say something without sounding truly idiotic, oh and the money required to allow me to do so. Beyond that, it will continue because yes, I’d like to start a family but more because whilst I’m awesome on my own (stop laughing you in the back), I’d like to be me with someone else. Kinda pathetic but it’s the truth.

So yeah, Null is back on the market (this may be a limited time offer).

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One response

12 03 2012
NullFuture

As an addendum to this, I’ve been wondering about the validity of my opinion about my looks (and ergo why I have yet to put a picture on my profile). I know my dislike for my looks has a deep rooted basis but when you think about it, and think about it I have, as my mind is my most highly prized asset (by me) then are looks that essential? Not really no, experience has taught me that looks don’t define love/attraction for me.

The upshot of all this is that I will update the profile with a picture of me at some point without obsessing it. Why? Because my looks are incidental, it’s what’s inside that truly counts. The person who contacted me made me realise this, kinda looking forward to contacting her (god I hope that doesn’t make me sound like and infatuated schoolgirl – I haven’t the legs to pull off the uniform)

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